I’ve just seen this, it was drawn to my attention on twitter by @andrewbaron and I have to say… Wow! Nice One!!
Basically, here is about the most responsible parenting you’ll find anywhere… This video was posted on Facebook and You Tube by father Tommy Jordan. He had just spent a day upgrading his daughters laptop and came across a letter she’d posted on Facebook… Enjoy the results.. and please, watch it all!!
Now… obviously people will or wont agree with this, so I can’t leave without posting what Tommy had to say in response to the comments left to and at him.
By Tommy Jordan
For those that wondered, commented, criticized, and just in general wanted to know: My daughter came through it fine.
Yes, she’s in trouble, and yes she’s grounded, but that doesn’t mean every moment of her life has to be miserable. She’s going to come to terms with the changes that will be present for a while; no TV privileges, no Internet, etc.
In the meantime, once the initial anger passed, she sat with me reviewing some of the comments that have come in via Facebook and YouTube. One person even suggested collecting the shell casings and auctioning them on eBay. I said I’d do it if it would help contribute to her college fund! When I told her about it, she thought a minute, got a funny calculating expression on her face and said, “in that case you should shoot my phone too. We can use more bullets and I’ll go half-sies with ya on it! It’s not like I’m going to need it any time soon. And I can use the money we get to buy a new one.”
While the whole point of this story isn’t funny, what is funny to me is how weak some people out there think kids are. Our kids are as strong as we help them to be. My daughter took a horrible day in her life, had her crying fit, then got over it, accepted her punishment, and hasn’t let it (or people’s comments) destroy her strength. I don’t get any credit for that. She’s strong and able to overcome almost anything life throws at her.
Since this unsuspectingly threw her into the limelight much more strongly than either of us intended, I asked her if she wanted to make her own response video, and told her I’d let her do it if she wanted to. She doesn’t like being in front of the camera, so she declined, but I’ve told her if she wants to write a response or post a video response, I’d be OK with it. It’s only fair considering the viral nature of the whole thing. So far she’s not really interested. Quite frankly it seems she’s gotten bored of it much faster than the general public has. If that changes I’ll post it here.
Finally, my thoughts…
Shaping the will without breaking the spirit makes great parenting and turns kids into fine adults, sometimes that line comes very close when it needs too, but break the spirit and you either destroy the child or turn them into a monster. But this wasn’t crossing any line, it was taking control of the situation in a manner that would be fully understood, clear and direct. The most important point of all is that Tommy took a day to think about this, didn’t go off the handle, and you could see how much he cared in his body language. He was beyond annoyed, he was hurt and let down greatly.
The last point, a kid who has the space to rebell and yet can accept their punishments for their wrong doing - will make a great adult…